Guess What? It's not about you!



"She couldn't even call me back!" My friend cries out! She'd gone to a job interview and hadn't heard back. "No one wants to hire me! I'll never get a job!" She proceeds to tell me how she feels depressed and unmotivated. Why? The story in her head! She has decided that because the interviewee didn't call her back she was a bad person, unworthy and no good. And we all do this! I know I do!

When I have people question me about something I've done inadvertently that has hurt them I'm usually shocked! It was not my intention at all! However, I too will make up stories about what other people are thinking about me! But, just like me, everyone is more involved with what is going on in their lives than yours!

The interviewee probably didn't call back because she was busy or trying to avoid the hard task of letting someone down! My friend didn't get the job but that doesn't mean she wasn't good enough for the job! It means another candidate was a better fit! It doesn't mean she isn't a fit for ANY job! Those are the stories she created to explain the situation.

Our brains naturally look for danger all the time. At one point this was useful to keep us safe from bears and other predators. Today these types of dangers are rare but evolution hasn't caught up yet. So start to question the voice that is constantly telling you something is wrong and your at fault! Recognize that the clerk at the grocery store isn't trying to be nasty to you! He/she is probably just having a bad day! Your spouse doesn't mean to ignore you, it doesn't mean they don't love you anymore or your marriage is ending, he/she is preoccupied with something else. I'm being dramatic, but you know you've gone there!

We don't know half of what is going on in other peoples lives! Let's not make assumptions! Remembering that you are worthy, good and perfect in every way. You are doing the best you can with what you have! Watch how much easier things become! How much happier you feel! What a weight is lifted! Cause guess what? It's not about you!


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